Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Batman the Dark Night
Batman the Dark night is a movie my daughters 16 and 14 and my son 10 have been so hyped up about, for so long, I anxiously agreed to buying tickets a week in advance. If for no other reason I wanted them to see it as soon as possible just so I could quit hearing all the talk. Well I have to say I am really glad they were so hyped up and that we were there on opening day. This was one of the best comic book stories brought to the screen I have ever watched. Batman is just to cool and Heath ledger truly was magnificent as the Joker. I have never seen anyone make this character so creepy and believable, including Jack Nicholson. I highly recommend this movie for both young and old. I saw Iron Man earlier this summer and was greatly impressed but this one was over the top! I hope you will go see it and enjoy it as much as we did. As for the hype, well my kids are still talking about it, whenever I stop long enough to let them!
YEE HAW!!! I MADE MONEY ON XOMBA.COM
I did It!!! Guess what folks little ol me did. I made money writing articles on Xomba. Why just a few weeks ago I was an unknown individual with dreams of some day getting paid to write. Then I stumbled upon Xomba. Like many of you I came with a little skepticism but figured I like writing so I might as well give it a whirl. Well only four weeks have passed and I hit pay dirt! That’s right Texas Tea as we Texans like to call it, black gold. I am not talking about the kind that’s $4.00 per gallon no I am talking about the black ink of a fresh pen, the free flowing ink of uncensored good old freedom of speech.
So I guess I‘ll be loading up the truck and moving on up to the brand new apartment in the sky. Or better yet next door to the Beverly hill billies. Well maybe neither just yet but for all you skeptics let it be known that on this day July 22, 2008 I made money from Google Adsense via my Xomba articles. It can be done!! Who knows next month I may be the King of the World!!!!
So I guess I‘ll be loading up the truck and moving on up to the brand new apartment in the sky. Or better yet next door to the Beverly hill billies. Well maybe neither just yet but for all you skeptics let it be known that on this day July 22, 2008 I made money from Google Adsense via my Xomba articles. It can be done!! Who knows next month I may be the King of the World!!!!
Thursday, July 10, 2008
An open and shut case on Garage Doors How to buy place or repair your garage door
This is the first of what will be a series of articles on one of the most exciting topics of all time. Garage Doors!! Yeah!! oh boy how exciting.
That is the typical reaction to this topic. I have worked in the Commercial and residential overhead door business for over twenty years. When I am out and meet someone new and the topic of work comes up people always say "Overhead what?" It really impresses the ladies!
So more than likely your reading this because you are either considering replacing an existing door or are building a new home, and need to purchase one for it. Not because its and exciting topic.
\
My goal is to give you enough information for you to feel confident when you are buying a garage door, Having one installed or doing it yourself. Also how to do your own preventative maintenance . I will do my best to make it as exciting and fun as possible.
Finally I will provide some information on when and how to repair your door. Also when not to repair. This is related to the topic of safety which will be a common theme throughout this series.
So lets get started. Before you even start looking for a company to purchase your door from you should consider several things and have a certain amount of information already prepared so you know what you want and need.
First of all most people in the past have not taken this purchase as seriously as they should. If you have a two car garage like most homeowners the typical or most common door width is 16'-0". The most common height is 7'-0" That is a large section of your homes exterior. Measure yours to make sure you know the correct size.
This may seem obvious but I cannot count the number of times I have had a homeowner tell me their door was a certain size and when I got there it was not.
Next you want to consider do you want an insulated door or non-insulated. If your garage is sheet rocked and insulated you should definitely consider an insulated door. I personally think if you can afford it, buy an insulated door. They keep the cold out in the winter and the heat out in the summer.
They typically are made with a steel front, insulation in the middle, and then a steel back panel. These sandwiched sections are also quieter when opening or closing the door. This feature comes in really handy when your getting in late and trying to sneak in with out waking the kids or whoever.
The next consideration is the actual appearance of the door. Today garage door manufacturers offer a wide variety of doors for just about any style of home. Since I mentioned earlier these doors are typically 16' by 7' that's a large section of your homes exterior. Make sure you pick one out that will match the architectural style of your home.
Most of the large door manufacturers have a place on their web sites where you can look at and design a door for your home. I have sold and worked with both "The Overhead Door Company" and "Clopay Doors" I can confidently recommend there products. There are a lot of other manufactures and some I am sure make good Doors and some don't. I am only mentioning the two above because I know their product and the companies well.
Now that you have measured your door, considered what you need and looked at some designs on the web its time to start looking for a local dealer. That is where we will start next. Trust me this will be probably the most important part of this whole process. So if there is anyway you can wait until the next article please do. Unfortunately this industry is overflowing with a wide range of dealer/ installers. From the very good to the very bad. I will tell you what to look for and when you need to run away and lock all your doors!
This is the first of what will be a series of articles on one of the most exciting topics of all time. Garage Doors!! Yeah!! oh boy how exciting.
That is the typical reaction to this topic. I have worked in the Commercial and residential overhead door business for over twenty years. When I am out and meet someone new and the topic of work comes up people always say "Overhead what?" It really impresses the ladies!
So more than likely your reading this because you are either considering replacing an existing door or are building a new home, and need to purchase one for it. Not because its and exciting topic.
\
My goal is to give you enough information for you to feel confident when you are buying a garage door, Having one installed or doing it yourself. Also how to do your own preventative maintenance . I will do my best to make it as exciting and fun as possible.
Finally I will provide some information on when and how to repair your door. Also when not to repair. This is related to the topic of safety which will be a common theme throughout this series.
So lets get started. Before you even start looking for a company to purchase your door from you should consider several things and have a certain amount of information already prepared so you know what you want and need.
First of all most people in the past have not taken this purchase as seriously as they should. If you have a two car garage like most homeowners the typical or most common door width is 16'-0". The most common height is 7'-0" That is a large section of your homes exterior. Measure yours to make sure you know the correct size.
This may seem obvious but I cannot count the number of times I have had a homeowner tell me their door was a certain size and when I got there it was not.
Next you want to consider do you want an insulated door or non-insulated. If your garage is sheet rocked and insulated you should definitely consider an insulated door. I personally think if you can afford it, buy an insulated door. They keep the cold out in the winter and the heat out in the summer.
They typically are made with a steel front, insulation in the middle, and then a steel back panel. These sandwiched sections are also quieter when opening or closing the door. This feature comes in really handy when your getting in late and trying to sneak in with out waking the kids or whoever.
The next consideration is the actual appearance of the door. Today garage door manufacturers offer a wide variety of doors for just about any style of home. Since I mentioned earlier these doors are typically 16' by 7' that's a large section of your homes exterior. Make sure you pick one out that will match the architectural style of your home.
Most of the large door manufacturers have a place on their web sites where you can look at and design a door for your home. I have sold and worked with both "The Overhead Door Company" and "Clopay Doors" I can confidently recommend there products. There are a lot of other manufactures and some I am sure make good Doors and some don't. I am only mentioning the two above because I know their product and the companies well.
Now that you have measured your door, considered what you need and looked at some designs on the web its time to start looking for a local dealer. That is where we will start next. Trust me this will be probably the most important part of this whole process. So if there is anyway you can wait until the next article please do. Unfortunately this industry is overflowing with a wide range of dealer/ installers. From the very good to the very bad. I will tell you what to look for and when you need to run away and lock all your doors!
How to turn every female on earth into your personal sex zombie!! Starting Now.
There are many sites and articles written on the topic of "How to be a Chick magnet". Most tell you that they alone have found the magic key to open the hearts of all women and make any girl you want fall in love with you overnight. Plus as a bonus five tips to make her crave your body for sex 24/7.
I must confess I have never paid for any of these top secret cure all programs and maybe I would be pleasantly surprised if I did. However, when I was in high school and up until I met my wife when I was 23, I never had a problem attracting women or getting a girlfriend. I married a girl who was far better than I ever in my wildest dreams thought I would get.
Unfortunately she died from Breast cancer in 1996. I never got a chance to date much after she died because 6 months after she died while still in deep grief and depression I met a young lady who made me feel loved and about 4 months later we married. She was also very attractive but not quite as mature or stable as the first one.
We separated after only 3 years and were divorced in January of 2000. So I have been living the single life for eight and a half years. With my first wife I experienced true love and a wonderful relationship built on trust. My second was one of turmoil, deceit unfaithfulness by her and an ugly divorce.
I do want to say on behalf of my ex. she is doing well we have put the past behind and have a very good and healthy relationship which is in the best interest of our son.
After the dust settled I told my children I would never bring anyone home to be a part of our family that didn't agree with our family mission statement.
That mission statement was something we worked out together while on a camping trip. I asked my kids if you could live in the perfect family what would it be like. What do you want most in a family? I gave them a couple of days to think about it then I had them write their ideas on blank paper and fold them up. I did that so no one would be afraid their suggestion wasn't cool. Then I began opening them up reading them out loud and prioritizing them. This eventually lead to our Family Mission Statement.
It defines who we are, gives us a clear standard or goal to reach for, and when we get off course it reminds us of our destination.
So LADIES ESPECIALLY I would love some feed back on these suggestions of how to attract women.
1) Know who you are as a man and where you’re going.
2) Know what you’re looking for or want in a companion.
3) If you haven't done one in two stop right now and do that because women are not attracted to men (on purpose) that have no direction, goals , are over 30 and still trying to figure out what they want, who they are, and what to be when they grow up.
4) Look for opportunities to help out the single women you know with household chores they can't or don't know how to do and can't afford. Be a giver not a taker. Just be friends for at least a year. That's right be friends for a year and watch them over a year as different issues come up. This way you can see more clearly how they react under pressure.
4) Treat women with respect and like a lady even if you know she's a drug addicted whore. Why? Because most likely it was one of our gender that made her that way. So quit judging her and calling her psycho when one of your buddies or some guy at one time took advantage of her ,treated her horribly, most likely physically abused her and then threw her away. Then goes around complaining about where are all the good girls these days!
5) Make a list of what character qualities you want, what sorts of habits and history you will or will not accept. Then stick to it.
6) Accept the fact that it is better to be alone and single then to compromise your entire list so for the short term you can get laid and feel loved. Only to later discover you shouldn't have compromised and settled. This only leads to broken hearts and another emotional setback.
7) Realize that though looks, to most men, are a key element that eventually they will all look like either old ladies or old bags. Sorry ladies but its true with both men and women. People who live their lives always seeing things negatively with a victim mentality and blame everyone else for their problems and get bitterer as they grow older age faster. They have permanent frowns and many times are very sickly. So of course you have to be physically attracted to her but what should be most attractive about her to you is who she is as a person.
8) Yes, that's right you better know who she is and what she wants, or your back to step three. How do you ever find that out? Ask questions and I don't mean questions like "are you cooking dinner yet" or did you have time to mow the yard today? or where's the remote? I mean questions like "if money wasn't an issue and you could do anything you wanted for the next year what would you do? The next five? Until you die? Or think of some open ended questions that will give you an idea of what her hopes, dreams, past things she's proud of and those that still cause her pain. Be truly interested in her as a person.
9) When it comes to the physical part of showing affection and all that leads up to sex, quit thinking about how good its going to be once you get past the foreplay and get to put it in for 30-60 seconds, then sigh and rollover to fall asleep like a selfish jerk. Instead read sex manuals written by women and magazine articles. If you don't already know how to please her, this will point you in the right direction. Here again the best way to find out what she likes most and what she doesn't is ask her and then be sure and listen to her answer.
I have found that when I completely forget about my own desires and completely focus on making sure that when we are through she will have a very satisfied smile on her face and hopefully say something like " Wow I haven't had sex like that in long time as a matter of fact that was about as good as it gets" You really turned me on and made me feel so sexy" Hopefully you get it by now. This can't be faked on your part because if your just doing it to ultimately get what you want she will know. But if you sincerely care about her and really want to treat her to the best time in her life trust me you will be rewarded for your unselfishness and will most likely be laying next to her saying " I know me too that was awesome"
10)Finally when your fortunate enough to find someone who matches your list, mission statement, and she is your best friend, then you better quickly realize you have found a most precious gem, a very rare beauty. Many men will live and die never having the good fortune of such a valuable find. If you have found one treat her as such. Realize that she is more precious than any jewel and treat her that way. Not just today but everyday and constantly do all you can to understand how you can please her , love her and make her feel like the princess, she always knew deep down she is. Never look back and never let up until death do you part.
You see I experienced this for eleven years of marriage and two of dating so for 13 years I was one of the fortunate ones. I still hope that I will some day find another rare jewel. Oh yeah one more thing I am not out desperately searching for her I am instead focused on my personal goals and my children. That is I am focused on what I can do something about. Yes that would be me. I still need much improvement and I want to be the best man she ever met. That's a real challenge and I know I have a long way to go.
SO GUYS HERE IS THE BOTTOM LINE THE REAL SECRET AND ITS FREE. BE A REAL MAN AND NOT A LOOSER. GO TO WORK, BE RESPONSIBLE, QUIT LYING AND CHEATING, BE SELF CONFIDENT AND NOT A WHINY MAMA'S BOY LOOKING FOR A MOMMA TO TAKE CARE OF YOU, FEED YOU, PROVIDE YOU WITH SEX ON DEMAND, WHILE YOU SIT ON YOUR BUTT AND GET HIGH, WHILE SHE IS AT WORK. IF YOU WILL FOLLOW THESE REALLY COMMON SENSE GUIDE LINES I BELIEVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS WITH WOMEN WILL IMPROVE DRAMATICALLY.
Ok, maybe I didn't really tell you how to make all the women in the world become sex zombies who want you and you alone. Sorry but the truth is if that is what you wanted to do to women, then you really needed to read this.
Finally I suspect many of those relationship gurus that charge $30.oo -$75.00 for their secrets don't really have much more insight to women then what you just got from me for free.
So Ladies am I all throwed off, crazy, or on the money?
I must confess I have never paid for any of these top secret cure all programs and maybe I would be pleasantly surprised if I did. However, when I was in high school and up until I met my wife when I was 23, I never had a problem attracting women or getting a girlfriend. I married a girl who was far better than I ever in my wildest dreams thought I would get.
Unfortunately she died from Breast cancer in 1996. I never got a chance to date much after she died because 6 months after she died while still in deep grief and depression I met a young lady who made me feel loved and about 4 months later we married. She was also very attractive but not quite as mature or stable as the first one.
We separated after only 3 years and were divorced in January of 2000. So I have been living the single life for eight and a half years. With my first wife I experienced true love and a wonderful relationship built on trust. My second was one of turmoil, deceit unfaithfulness by her and an ugly divorce.
I do want to say on behalf of my ex. she is doing well we have put the past behind and have a very good and healthy relationship which is in the best interest of our son.
After the dust settled I told my children I would never bring anyone home to be a part of our family that didn't agree with our family mission statement.
That mission statement was something we worked out together while on a camping trip. I asked my kids if you could live in the perfect family what would it be like. What do you want most in a family? I gave them a couple of days to think about it then I had them write their ideas on blank paper and fold them up. I did that so no one would be afraid their suggestion wasn't cool. Then I began opening them up reading them out loud and prioritizing them. This eventually lead to our Family Mission Statement.
It defines who we are, gives us a clear standard or goal to reach for, and when we get off course it reminds us of our destination.
So LADIES ESPECIALLY I would love some feed back on these suggestions of how to attract women.
1) Know who you are as a man and where you’re going.
2) Know what you’re looking for or want in a companion.
3) If you haven't done one in two stop right now and do that because women are not attracted to men (on purpose) that have no direction, goals , are over 30 and still trying to figure out what they want, who they are, and what to be when they grow up.
4) Look for opportunities to help out the single women you know with household chores they can't or don't know how to do and can't afford. Be a giver not a taker. Just be friends for at least a year. That's right be friends for a year and watch them over a year as different issues come up. This way you can see more clearly how they react under pressure.
4) Treat women with respect and like a lady even if you know she's a drug addicted whore. Why? Because most likely it was one of our gender that made her that way. So quit judging her and calling her psycho when one of your buddies or some guy at one time took advantage of her ,treated her horribly, most likely physically abused her and then threw her away. Then goes around complaining about where are all the good girls these days!
5) Make a list of what character qualities you want, what sorts of habits and history you will or will not accept. Then stick to it.
6) Accept the fact that it is better to be alone and single then to compromise your entire list so for the short term you can get laid and feel loved. Only to later discover you shouldn't have compromised and settled. This only leads to broken hearts and another emotional setback.
7) Realize that though looks, to most men, are a key element that eventually they will all look like either old ladies or old bags. Sorry ladies but its true with both men and women. People who live their lives always seeing things negatively with a victim mentality and blame everyone else for their problems and get bitterer as they grow older age faster. They have permanent frowns and many times are very sickly. So of course you have to be physically attracted to her but what should be most attractive about her to you is who she is as a person.
8) Yes, that's right you better know who she is and what she wants, or your back to step three. How do you ever find that out? Ask questions and I don't mean questions like "are you cooking dinner yet" or did you have time to mow the yard today? or where's the remote? I mean questions like "if money wasn't an issue and you could do anything you wanted for the next year what would you do? The next five? Until you die? Or think of some open ended questions that will give you an idea of what her hopes, dreams, past things she's proud of and those that still cause her pain. Be truly interested in her as a person.
9) When it comes to the physical part of showing affection and all that leads up to sex, quit thinking about how good its going to be once you get past the foreplay and get to put it in for 30-60 seconds, then sigh and rollover to fall asleep like a selfish jerk. Instead read sex manuals written by women and magazine articles. If you don't already know how to please her, this will point you in the right direction. Here again the best way to find out what she likes most and what she doesn't is ask her and then be sure and listen to her answer.
I have found that when I completely forget about my own desires and completely focus on making sure that when we are through she will have a very satisfied smile on her face and hopefully say something like " Wow I haven't had sex like that in long time as a matter of fact that was about as good as it gets" You really turned me on and made me feel so sexy" Hopefully you get it by now. This can't be faked on your part because if your just doing it to ultimately get what you want she will know. But if you sincerely care about her and really want to treat her to the best time in her life trust me you will be rewarded for your unselfishness and will most likely be laying next to her saying " I know me too that was awesome"
10)Finally when your fortunate enough to find someone who matches your list, mission statement, and she is your best friend, then you better quickly realize you have found a most precious gem, a very rare beauty. Many men will live and die never having the good fortune of such a valuable find. If you have found one treat her as such. Realize that she is more precious than any jewel and treat her that way. Not just today but everyday and constantly do all you can to understand how you can please her , love her and make her feel like the princess, she always knew deep down she is. Never look back and never let up until death do you part.
You see I experienced this for eleven years of marriage and two of dating so for 13 years I was one of the fortunate ones. I still hope that I will some day find another rare jewel. Oh yeah one more thing I am not out desperately searching for her I am instead focused on my personal goals and my children. That is I am focused on what I can do something about. Yes that would be me. I still need much improvement and I want to be the best man she ever met. That's a real challenge and I know I have a long way to go.
SO GUYS HERE IS THE BOTTOM LINE THE REAL SECRET AND ITS FREE. BE A REAL MAN AND NOT A LOOSER. GO TO WORK, BE RESPONSIBLE, QUIT LYING AND CHEATING, BE SELF CONFIDENT AND NOT A WHINY MAMA'S BOY LOOKING FOR A MOMMA TO TAKE CARE OF YOU, FEED YOU, PROVIDE YOU WITH SEX ON DEMAND, WHILE YOU SIT ON YOUR BUTT AND GET HIGH, WHILE SHE IS AT WORK. IF YOU WILL FOLLOW THESE REALLY COMMON SENSE GUIDE LINES I BELIEVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS WITH WOMEN WILL IMPROVE DRAMATICALLY.
Ok, maybe I didn't really tell you how to make all the women in the world become sex zombies who want you and you alone. Sorry but the truth is if that is what you wanted to do to women, then you really needed to read this.
Finally I suspect many of those relationship gurus that charge $30.oo -$75.00 for their secrets don't really have much more insight to women then what you just got from me for free.
So Ladies am I all throwed off, crazy, or on the money?
Take a single Dad add five children and cancer and what do you get? Heroes!
Raising children is one of the most rewarding endeavors this life has to offer. It can also be one of the most frustrating, heart wrenching, emotional basket case creating experiences as well.
I know from my own experience. You see my wife I married back in 1984. I was 25 and she was a mere 19. We found out we were expecting our first child. Although this was not planned we were both very surprised and initially reacted quite different. I was elated! I was so excited that I couldn't keep my mouth shut as promised and within thirty minutes all my co-workers and most of my family were celebrating the news.
On the other hand my girlfriend soon to be wife was a freshman in college and had planned on getting a degree in accounting. This was obviously going to change her career plans up a bit. Well two weeks later I was married to the most wonderful, beautiful, funny, intelligent etc... Woman in the world. I soon discovered her greatest gift had yet to be seen. That gift was being a Mom. You see her mom died from breast cancer when she was only two years old. Her dad never remarried so she and her older sister grew up without a mom. You might think then how was she such a good mom with no example? Easy, she remembered all the things she always wanted and wished she had in a mother, and did not have. That's what she gave to our children and who she became.
Moving ahead a bit by 1994 she was 28 years old and I was 34. She had given birth to 3 more children giving us a total of four. Two girls, then a boy, and then another girl. She was pregnant with our fifth child when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. In April of 1996 she, just like her mom, died at the age of 32.
My world was turned upside down and the love of my life was gone. I had 5 children that were 10,8,6,4, and 2. What’s a young man to do? Well like many men do I in the midst of great grief and confusion was shortly caught up in a new relationship with a girl much younger than me who was a single mom.
Ten months after my wife died I married this young lady. Three months later guess what? Yep number six was on the way. He was born in January of 1998. In January of 1999 my 2nd born daughter who was eleven was diagnosed with Adrenal cortical carcinomas. A rare incurable childhood cancer of the adrenal gland. She went to be with her mom in November of 1999.
The day after her funeral wife number two had done her best but this was all too much for her. She left us, including our son for a less stressful life. This was a very dark and difficult time for all of us. I might also mention while all this was going on my 15 year old nephew was killed in a car accident, my brother turned forty in the hospital while in a coma brought on by a massive overdose of morphine and died, and my Dad and step dad both died. One from cancer the other a heart attack.
Now I say all this not to get your sympathy or to cause you to feel sorry for us. My point in bring all this up in an article that is suppose to be about children and child rearing is that if this hell raising ex-heroin addict who had only been sober a few years when he got married can do it so can you! Yes that is my point. I have been raising five Children alone for the past 12 years.
My oldest daughter graduated from Texas Tech University on May 10th 2008. Next my 18 year old son just finished his freshman year at the University of Notre Dame. He made the Deans Honor role. He came home for a few weeks and while he was here he wrote and produced his first ever original song with a childhood friend down the street. It is absolutely awesome and I am confident many of you will eventually hear it on the radio.
My 16 year old daughter will be a senior this year in high school. She is a beautiful intelligent young lady with an A -B average in a very good public school.
The baby from my first wife is now 14 and will be a freshman in High school. She too is a very beautiful young lady with mostly straight A report cards her whole life. My youngest from my second wife is a 10 year old boy with a smile as big as his heart and also a well behaved A student.
So you say what’s my secret? Well guess what? There is no secret. What I have done, and I say I, but what I mean or should say is we, meaning their mom while she was here, and my family, friends, and neighbors that have helped us over the years is loved them. That would be my first point of advice. If you as a man or woman are not sure if you want children please don't have them until you are sure you want them.
You see for me it has been in some ways a real challenge but in many more it has been the joy of my life and is what I love doing. I briefly mentioned I was a ex-heroin addict. That’s a whole other book but for now it’s safe to say I did not grow up in the best of homes. My parents divorced when I was eight. My siblings a sister and two brothers (I am the baby) and I moved to a new area with my mom and for the 2 years she was single things got out of control and were never brought back into control.
So I had always thought and knew if I ever had kids I did not want them to grow up as I did feeling unloved and unwanted. I also knew I did not want them to suffer the consequences of never learning to obey or respect authority and the consequences of growing up as a cool gangsta as they call it these days.
I know the damage drugs, crime and living a undisciplined life can do. Having suffered and still reaping the consequences of my former life. I have made sacrifices to be with my kids and not always climbed the career ladder for the next big promotion or pay raise if it meant traveling or more time away from home.
We have struggled financially for the past 12 years. I have had the unfortunate experience of teaching them how to be resourceful by using the welfare system for food and medical care. We live in area where the average income is around $85,000.00 a year. I have done my part to bring that average way down. My Children know I love them. They also know that if I say no I mean it. They also know if I say "if you do this, then I will do this" and I mean it.
Having said that am I 100% consistent? Duh! of course not I am a single dad who was once a partying mad man and some say I still am at least mad. I have made many mistakes. However, I have admitted it to them and many times had to apologize and ask them to forgive me.
I try to be very real with them. They also have grown up attending church. Not perfect attendance but enough to know it’s important to me and should be to them.
Why am I writing this article? Not to brag about myself and what a great job I have done, because the truth is they are the ones who are great! They are the ones I am so proud of. They are my heroes.
When tragedy struck our family again and again there were times I felt we would never make it. Oh did I mention my son, the 18 year old at Notre Dame, was diagnosed with bone cancer in March of 2005? Sorry but I guess that one slipped by because all we had to do was go through a summer of him receiving seven inpatient doses of chemotherapy and a major surgery to remove his tumor and a portion of his shin. He is our first survivor!
He is doing great! He and all of my children are my heroes. When their mother died I told them we could easily use this as an excuse for failure as a family and as individuals. We could use this as an excuse to escape reality through various means. However, I said that's not what we are going to do. That is not the kind of family we are and not the kind of people we are.
I said we are survivors and survivors do not quit and they never give up. No matter what! Guess what? They believed me and have proved my statement to be true! If it were not for them I many times wonder if I would be a survivor. They have kept me accountable, given back to me 5 times plus the love I have given them.
Now that they are growing up they are requiring lees attention yet giving back so much. So for those of you who are considering having children? I hope you will consider it carefully. If you decide to have children understand your commitment is for the rest of your life. Treat it that way and I promise the rewards far out weigh any of the difficulties you may encounter along the way.
If you already have them and are struggling I hope this will encourage you in some way. You are not alone. Someone once said "kids, they keep you on your toes and on your knee's.
I got to go my daughter just informed my time is up on the computer
Raising children is one of the most rewarding endeavors this life has to offer. It can also be one of the most frustrating, heart wrenching, emotional basket case creating experiences as well.
I know from my own experience. You see my wife I married back in 1984. I was 25 and she was a mere 19. We found out we were expecting our first child. Although this was not planned we were both very surprised and initially reacted quite different. I was elated! I was so excited that I couldn't keep my mouth shut as promised and within thirty minutes all my co-workers and most of my family were celebrating the news.
On the other hand my girlfriend soon to be wife was a freshman in college and had planned on getting a degree in accounting. This was obviously going to change her career plans up a bit. Well two weeks later I was married to the most wonderful, beautiful, funny, intelligent etc... Woman in the world. I soon discovered her greatest gift had yet to be seen. That gift was being a Mom. You see her mom died from breast cancer when she was only two years old. Her dad never remarried so she and her older sister grew up without a mom. You might think then how was she such a good mom with no example? Easy, she remembered all the things she always wanted and wished she had in a mother, and did not have. That's what she gave to our children and who she became.
Moving ahead a bit by 1994 she was 28 years old and I was 34. She had given birth to 3 more children giving us a total of four. Two girls, then a boy, and then another girl. She was pregnant with our fifth child when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. In April of 1996 she, just like her mom, died at the age of 32.
My world was turned upside down and the love of my life was gone. I had 5 children that were 10,8,6,4, and 2. What’s a young man to do? Well like many men do I in the midst of great grief and confusion was shortly caught up in a new relationship with a girl much younger than me who was a single mom.
Ten months after my wife died I married this young lady. Three months later guess what? Yep number six was on the way. He was born in January of 1998. In January of 1999 my 2nd born daughter who was eleven was diagnosed with Adrenal cortical carcinomas. A rare incurable childhood cancer of the adrenal gland. She went to be with her mom in November of 1999.
The day after her funeral wife number two had done her best but this was all too much for her. She left us, including our son for a less stressful life. This was a very dark and difficult time for all of us. I might also mention while all this was going on my 15 year old nephew was killed in a car accident, my brother turned forty in the hospital while in a coma brought on by a massive overdose of morphine and died, and my Dad and step dad both died. One from cancer the other a heart attack.
Now I say all this not to get your sympathy or to cause you to feel sorry for us. My point in bring all this up in an article that is suppose to be about children and child rearing is that if this hell raising ex-heroin addict who had only been sober a few years when he got married can do it so can you! Yes that is my point. I have been raising five Children alone for the past 12 years.
My oldest daughter graduated from Texas Tech University on May 10th 2008. Next my 18 year old son just finished his freshman year at the University of Notre Dame. He made the Deans Honor role. He came home for a few weeks and while he was here he wrote and produced his first ever original song with a childhood friend down the street. It is absolutely awesome and I am confident many of you will eventually hear it on the radio.
My 16 year old daughter will be a senior this year in high school. She is a beautiful intelligent young lady with an A -B average in a very good public school.
The baby from my first wife is now 14 and will be a freshman in High school. She too is a very beautiful young lady with mostly straight A report cards her whole life. My youngest from my second wife is a 10 year old boy with a smile as big as his heart and also a well behaved A student.
So you say what’s my secret? Well guess what? There is no secret. What I have done, and I say I, but what I mean or should say is we, meaning their mom while she was here, and my family, friends, and neighbors that have helped us over the years is loved them. That would be my first point of advice. If you as a man or woman are not sure if you want children please don't have them until you are sure you want them.
You see for me it has been in some ways a real challenge but in many more it has been the joy of my life and is what I love doing. I briefly mentioned I was a ex-heroin addict. That’s a whole other book but for now it’s safe to say I did not grow up in the best of homes. My parents divorced when I was eight. My siblings a sister and two brothers (I am the baby) and I moved to a new area with my mom and for the 2 years she was single things got out of control and were never brought back into control.
So I had always thought and knew if I ever had kids I did not want them to grow up as I did feeling unloved and unwanted. I also knew I did not want them to suffer the consequences of never learning to obey or respect authority and the consequences of growing up as a cool gangsta as they call it these days.
I know the damage drugs, crime and living a undisciplined life can do. Having suffered and still reaping the consequences of my former life. I have made sacrifices to be with my kids and not always climbed the career ladder for the next big promotion or pay raise if it meant traveling or more time away from home.
We have struggled financially for the past 12 years. I have had the unfortunate experience of teaching them how to be resourceful by using the welfare system for food and medical care. We live in area where the average income is around $85,000.00 a year. I have done my part to bring that average way down. My Children know I love them. They also know that if I say no I mean it. They also know if I say "if you do this, then I will do this" and I mean it.
Having said that am I 100% consistent? Duh! of course not I am a single dad who was once a partying mad man and some say I still am at least mad. I have made many mistakes. However, I have admitted it to them and many times had to apologize and ask them to forgive me.
I try to be very real with them. They also have grown up attending church. Not perfect attendance but enough to know it’s important to me and should be to them.
Why am I writing this article? Not to brag about myself and what a great job I have done, because the truth is they are the ones who are great! They are the ones I am so proud of. They are my heroes.
When tragedy struck our family again and again there were times I felt we would never make it. Oh did I mention my son, the 18 year old at Notre Dame, was diagnosed with bone cancer in March of 2005? Sorry but I guess that one slipped by because all we had to do was go through a summer of him receiving seven inpatient doses of chemotherapy and a major surgery to remove his tumor and a portion of his shin. He is our first survivor!
He is doing great! He and all of my children are my heroes. When their mother died I told them we could easily use this as an excuse for failure as a family and as individuals. We could use this as an excuse to escape reality through various means. However, I said that's not what we are going to do. That is not the kind of family we are and not the kind of people we are.
I said we are survivors and survivors do not quit and they never give up. No matter what! Guess what? They believed me and have proved my statement to be true! If it were not for them I many times wonder if I would be a survivor. They have kept me accountable, given back to me 5 times plus the love I have given them.
Now that they are growing up they are requiring lees attention yet giving back so much. So for those of you who are considering having children? I hope you will consider it carefully. If you decide to have children understand your commitment is for the rest of your life. Treat it that way and I promise the rewards far out weigh any of the difficulties you may encounter along the way.
If you already have them and are struggling I hope this will encourage you in some way. You are not alone. Someone once said "kids, they keep you on your toes and on your knee's.
I got to go my daughter just informed my time is up on the computer
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